Mia Von Scha, Author at zaparents

Why We Should Replace Time-Outs With Time-Ins

by Mia Von Scha | behaviour, discipline | 12 comments

When a child is in a time-out, I absolutely guarantee you that they are not thinking about the wrongness of their behavior, what they can do to make amends, or how they can improve in the future. What they are thinking about is either how much they hate you and how they can get revenge, or how much they hate themselves and what a terrible, unworthy human being they are.

The Discipline Issue…

by Mia Von Scha | behaviour, boundaries, discipline, tantrums | 0 comments

The word discipline comes from the word disciple, which means to lead. Leading means being a good example of how things are done rather than telling people what to do. Leading does not involve hitting people or banishing them from your presence. Great leaders are generally patient because they can remember how it feels to not know what they do now and how to assist their disciples in going beyond their current state.

Special needs or need something special

by Mia Von Scha | ADHD, Alternative schools, homeschooling, learning, traditional schooling | 20 comments

There are many children struggling in school who don’t need to be placed in remedial classes. They need something special, but they’re not exactly special needs. They would thrive in a different environment but not that one.

Surviving Matric results – a parents guide

by Mia Von Scha | exams | 0 comments

When we hear that two students have committed suicide over their matric results we can’t help but put ourselves in the shoes of those parents… wondering how we can stop ourselves from ever being in the position of these unfortunate parents.

In The Best Interests of The Child

by Mia Von Scha | Alternative schools, homeschooling | 0 comments

Aside from the stigma, loss of income, potential halting of a good career and overall impact on the economy at large, there are serious long term consequences to putting someone into the criminal justice system. The stress that this would place on the parent and family is enough to cause both physical and mental breakdown in most people.

#metoo: guiding your children

by Mia Von Scha | boundaries, communication, human rights, Self-esteem, violence | 0 comments

The main way that children learn consent is by getting to practice it themselves. They need opportunities to say “no” and also to have “no” said to them and to learn the appropriate responses. As adults, we violate this in so many subtle ways every day.

Using death to improve your parenting

by Mia Von Scha | bonding, parenting, parents | 0 comments

When we truly contemplate death, that the possibility exists that either we or our children may not make it through today, then it starts to change the kind of questions we ask in our parenting. And questions shape our experience of reality by focusing our minds on what is important.

Are we setting our kids up for failure?

by Mia Von Scha | child development, independence, parenting | 7 comments

Our children will not succeed from extra lessons, or never falling over, or having us at their beck and call every minute. They will learn success by emulating us and seeing that we’ve made it through some pretty tough times and we’re still OK.

10 tips for encouraging a growth mindset

by Mia Von Scha | education, learning | 8 comments

Everything is difficult at first. In fact, everyone struggles to some degree with a new task. But with practice and a dedication to continue, everything gets easier. We were all born with the ability to learn and grow – not just some people.

Should we be giving our teens condoms?

by Mia Von Scha | sex | 7 comments

I don’t think there is a parent on the planet who wouldn’t cringe at the thought of their 12 year old having sex. And so when our education department proposes to hand out condoms to kids aged 12 and up, without any parental consent needed, we may feel a little uneasy. It is understandable that many parents oppose this idea, regardless of the thought processes behind it.

13 ways to protect your teen from alleged “Blue Whale” suicide game

by Mia Von Scha | suicide | 5 comments

There is a rumour about an online game going around the teen and preteen world, known as “Blue Whale” (also called VT) that is creating a sense of panic amongst parents. So how do we save our children from becoming “Blue Whales” in the first place, or bring them back from the brink of death if they are already involved in something like this?

Kids and strangers: 6 skills that will empower your children.

by Mia Von Scha | emotions | 3 comments

It is probably the worst fear of any parent – that their child might be kidnapped or molested. It’s the stuff of our nightmares and the kind of movies you can never watch again once you’ve had your own kids